I’m living such a different life now I thought to put it into writing. 

I have lived in Edmonton, AB, Canada for 26 years… 

Currently I have been living in Saudi Arabia for 5 months. 

This is the first time I have been away from my family this long. As much as it pains me, I would never regret it as this has been an experience of a lifetime. 

I remember getting to know my husband. Our relationship was long distance as he was living in Saudi Arabia, and at the time I was in Canada. It was difficult, but worth it as it made our love so much stronger. I could not wait to just pack all my things, and move away with him. 

Of course there would be days I’d cry to my mom, and not know how I would be able to leave her, and the rest of my family. It was such a stressful time for me. But she always told me, and that’s what kept me believing in my self, 

“Rayan you have always been an independent girl, and you are strong, I can not imagine any one doing this better than you.”

My mother is my whole world, and without her I wouldn’t have the courage to be where I am.

When I arrived to Saudi Arabia for the first time, I have to be honest I hated it.

I know HATE is such a strong word. 

I felt trapped, lost, and confused. I was coming from a western country that was so open to women doing what they want. I missed my job, my car, my friends, my freedom. The more time went on, I realized why I had so much hate…it’s because I came with such a closed mind to this country. 

Most of my family and friends in Canada would put negative thoughts in my head about if I’d be able to actually survive in Saudi Arabia. I know I should of not let people get to me, but it happens. 

The most important thing I learned is to not take people’s opinions on things they have no idea about. I got to come to this country, and completely change my outlook on it all.

Glad my opinion about this country has changed, and I can take positive vibes back to Canada. 

I am lucky though I have a very patient husband, that tries to make me feel more comfortable everyday. He is the true reason I can finally see my self living here long term.

I live in a city named Abha. It is amazing, and calm. The views are breathtaking. 

I never considered my self to be a religious person, but it so incredible what a muslim country does to you. It opened my eyes to things I did not know existed.

In Canada being a muslim women wearing a scarf, sometimes I felt uncomfortable walking into a room full of non-muslims, but imagine here in Saudi Arabia.. EVERYONE IS THE SAME. Literally all men and women are dressed alike. You feel super comfortable, and never judged.

My dream, and one of the reasons I came to this country was so I can go to Mecca, and see the Kaaba with my two eyes. The day my husband told me we will visit Mecca and perform Umrah, I cried(happy tears).

What I did not know, is seeing the Kaaba was better than anything I could of dreamt. Being able to walk up close to it, and touch it was like something I can not describe. 

It felt like my soul finally found home. 

Being able to visit Mecca, and also Medina and just seeing so many things I have learned from school, and my father about Islam and our Prophets, you just see so much proof in our religion. It has completely made me a better muslim.

I feel I am very lucky to be in a country where our beloved prophet Muhammad (PBUH) was once, and I pray all Muslims get a chance to visit, and understand all I am writing about. 

I will be sharing many more of my experiences here, so keep checking back!